This Post is dedicated to Adam and his mother Annie:
The Love that Lives There. Thank you God. Amen
Praise and Worship with us. . .
Thank you for the wet washings in Worship Annie, with this song referral. I’m trying to find that girl in me again, the one whose heart could embrace abandon in Praise and Worship. She is not lost, He knows just where I am. She will find her way back to the path that leads to Praise and Worship.
For a while after my diagnosis, I could not listen to my Worship music. I needed silence more than any melody. (So unlike me, Worship Music on 24/7 in my kitchen and often car). Slowly over the months, I began to carefully expose my heart to certain songs. Others, I purposefully boycotted. Still, my heart remained unmoved as the selected music went in one ear and out the other.
I felt like a stunned songbird that hit the clear glass, in full speed flight, with what I thought was my air space. . .so stunned it knocked the song right out of my heart.
Then, I went to a church concert and I felt myself pray, “Lord, move the music way down deep so my self responds on a cellular level to You.” I trusted He made it so.
Then, I played some music with an old friend, from our High School Church Choir, with Ester Socolosky and our Godspell Tour to Colorado. I could touch the memory of my part in a trio that sang, “On The Willows.”
Then, I played Worship music, softly, while a dear friend and I “crafted” cards.
My music today is reclaiming height, depth and width in Praise. My heart is stirring again to His Call in the music of my life. I’m not where I was, I’m somewhere beyond that girl. I’m on a different path to Worship. The Steven Curtis Chapman with John Gray and Laura Story and my family for my birthday has invested healing in my Worship life. I cannot sing out loud anymore (It was one of the first things “to go”), and as much as I miss that aspect of my Worship response, perhaps the cells singing deeply dance for me.
Lord, thank you that Worship takes on different forms as we journey our lives with you. We praise you with this opportunity to “keep our eyes above the waves” and broaden our “trust to a place without boarders.” Amen and Amen
This was my first text message from my faithful friend this morning, before she read the post. No coincidences!