The Way You Love Me

“The Way You Love Me” by Anthony Evans, Jr.

This heart breaks slowly
Tell me what are you doing to me
When I prayed do what it takes
*I didn’t know I’d lose everything
*Everything that meant anything to me is gone
How could something so right go so wrong
*It is the hurt that breaks me
*And it’s the pain that pulls me to my knees
*And the tears they’ve changed me
Til what I couldn’t see
*Becomes so clear to me
This is the way
*The way that you love me
My way destroyed me
I couldn’t see I was my worst enemy
So you took away til my soul ached
And I knew that it was no mistake
That everything that meant anything to me was gone
*Now something right has to come from this wrong
*It is the hurt that breaks me
*And it’s the pain that pulls me to my knees
*And the tears they’ve changed me
Til what I couldn’t see
*Becomes so clear to me
This is the way
*The way that you love me
You loved me so much that you let me
*You let me fall knowing that I would loose it all and hear your call
You love me so much that you chase me
*When I ran away you captured me by letting me run to the end of myself
To the end of myself and this is way you love

*LYRICS I RELATE TO.

This song hits so close to “home” it hurts to share it with you.  I know God did NOT give me ALS.   The way He loves me is SO HARD to discern because the love is so tangled with the pain.  What gives me moments of clarity are the simple things I used to take for granted:  “mom”, sunshine on my shoulders, a full laugh, snuggling with my husband even when I am mad at him, holding a pen, and the gift of a hug.  This is the way He loves me:  the magic momentum of the Body of Christ, you continue to gift me with comments even though I can’t respond, every breath I take… Life in the way He loves me is bleeding me into the sacrifice of thanksgiving.  I loveth thee, TWE

11 thoughts on “The Way You Love Me

  1. Mrs. Tracey, you are truly AMAZING and this blog is so humbling; I tried to call your cell phone and leave a message, but it was unavailable. Anyway, I’m responding here it hopes that you’ll get my message (and can follow my typing/thoughts as writing/blogging is not my thing – haha…. but is so your giftedness and talent!

    This one brought tears of sadness and joy!!! And wow, what a powerful song and while I can not relate to your experience with ALS, I so understand and can only imagine. I miss you dearly, and though I don’t see you as often as we’d like, you (and Bucky and the girls) are on my heart and in my prayers and I thank you for your heart felt thoughts and prayers for me and my family. I can’t thank you enough for opening your life, sharing your family, sharing your highs and lows, just being real, vulnerable and authentic. For being Jesus in skin to me and so so many others! I so appreciate your gentle reminders (God’s timing is perfect), via blogs like this or texts, and I ask for your forgiveness for taking your voice for granted; I miss it so. I hope you know that I “hear it” (your voice) loud and clear and gentle and painful in this song you’ve so graciously shared with us by Anthony Evans. And I “hear it” in many other moments in my life, like when I see sunflowers (especially big, bright yellow ones, LOL).

    Oh Mrs. Tracey, I can’t wait to see you Saturday at the ALS walk and give you a big hug. I love you too! And thank you for being you and gifting me and my kiddos! I’m asking our Father for His love, comfort, healing and mercy to be pour over you today and always and may you experience it as being closer than the breath you breathe. In Jesus name, Amen!

    I love you my God-send of an angel! Jesus in skin… In His Love and mine, Onalise

  2. My Precious Prissy Pot-Tracey: I will NOT give up. During my “Quiet Times” with the Lord, I look at the photo you gave me for Christmas of the mountain with our verse and I pray for you and read our verse. I am moving mountains in prayer.
    FOR TRULY, I SAY TO YOU, WHOEVER SAYS TO THIS MOUNTAIN, BE MOVED AND BE THROWN INTO THE SEA AND DOES NOT DOUBT IN HIS HEART, BUT BELIEVES WHAT HE SAYS SHALL BE DONE, HE SHALL HAVE WHATEVER HE SAYS.
    Mark 11:23
    I LOVE YOU !! Connie Frank- Your Lady Bug

  3. I miss you and love you and because of your example and love for me , I have become closer to our Savior.
    You are my hero. Every night I pray for your sweet husband and girls. I thank God for you. I am so humbled by your faithfulness.

  4. Tracey, Even in your weakness, the Lord has made you strong. We all see it and are inspired by it. I thank the Lord for your life and how it has had a ripple effect on so many. I am praying for graces in abundance for you, and for deep peace and comfort. Thank you for sharing your heart. Love to you and Bucky and the girls!

  5. Tracey- you will never know how many people you touch in so many ways by your willingness to endure and give glimpses into your world. Thank you for being incredibly honest.

  6. You are a wonderful wife. THANK YOU for snuggling with me in all circumstances. You are even more my hero with the way you have handled this DIFFICULT journey of ALS….Bucky

  7. Oh, Tracey. Such poignant words. Your faith inspires me more than you’ll ever know. Much love to you and your precious family.

  8. Tracey, you humble me. Even when I don’t see you often, you are in my heart and prayers.

    “Since He did not spare even His own Son but gave Him up for us all, won’t He also give us everything else?” Romans 8:32
    I know it all makes sense; just not right now.

    Buttercup, I love you. 3X

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